As my birthday approaches, I am in a reflective mood. Last year’s birthday pretty much passed me by, as I was in post-Disney World mode, anxiously waiting on my university results. And the year before that was my 40th, one that I did love and celebrate. As my 42nd is sneaking up on me, I am looking back over a few and thinking about the next few. Taking stock, I suppose.
When I was 20, I was dating the Husband and I was a retail manager (a bookstore, of course). When I was 30, I was married to the Husband and we were living in our second home together. I was an area manager at a building society. When I was 40, we had had our two children and I was a blogger and a student. What will 50 bring?
Although I can’t imagine them at these ages, I want to be close to my 17 year old daughter and 14 year old son. I want all of my parents to be happy and healthy. I want to still see lots of our extended family. I want to still be laughing every day with my husband. I am comfortable with the idea of living in this same house, though I like change so I wouldn’t take moving off the table!
I guess that as I look at this, I want so many things to remain as they are. I want my loved ones around me, happy. These are the big things, aren’t they? The foundations on which everything else is built.
So want would I want to be different? I think the big thing that springs to mind here is work.
I like new challenges, I like being busy. I would like a new career. The problem is that it clashes somewhat with my desire to be here for the kids. I don’t want to sacrifice any time and attention that they get to pursue a new career and passion. But somewhere down the line, I can see that changing.
Am I too old to do that anyway? I don’t feel it, and I feel that I have loads to give. I could burst with ideas and enthusiasm sometimes! I do have a few thoughts around this, so maybe in time I will get to explore them.
In other areas, I wonder how many times I’ll have been to Disney World when I hit 50? Loads, yes? And that’s a big enough birthday to totally justify another trip anyway, clearly…! I’d also like to have taken the kids to a few different cities on adventures as they grow up.
I can’t really picture life at 50, to be honest. When I look at my life at 20, 30 and 40, they were all so completely different, more different than I could have imagined, I hesitate to guess at 50!
I think for now, I will concentrate on enjoying my upcoming 42nd and see what the year brings. I know it will involve a puppy, another Disney World trip and I am hoping for sunshine. Aside from that, let’s see where it takes me…
Do you enjoy your birthdays? Do you take a moment to reflect?