I’m writing this through a haze of tears and exhaustion, so forgive me if I ramble on a little. I’ll be as clear as I can be.
Why, oh why, do you torture me so?
You’ve heard of toddlers, yes? They are fun-loving, gorgeous little scamps, but they are also stubborn, fiercely independent and have a definite leaning towards unreasonable behaviour.
So, when I need to just nip in and grab a couple of bits and bobs from you, I beg of you, don’t have one of these in your entrance….(I refer to the ride-on, not the boy, you understand)
Have you any idea at all how immoveable small people can become when confronted with such vehicular delights? Yes, you probably have, and so you aim to please them and tend to their every whim with these little treats. But Shop, when did you last see a toddler paying for your wares? If I’m your consumer, shouldn’t it be me that you’re aiming to please? And believe me when I say that these do not please me.
Who even uses them? I think I’ve only ever seen them actually moving around 5 times in my entire life. I cannot be the only parent advising my children that they are broken every single time they attempt to inveigle a coin from me?
Please, I’m begging you, remove them. They serve no purpose. They are not going to persuade me to enter your premises. They will only ensure a huge commotion and scuffle as I attempt to wrestle said tot off the thing, literally kicking and screaming. No-one needs that, least of all me. And no, I won’t give in and part with my £1. That is one precedent I am determined not to set.
P.S. while you’re removing these ‘fun rides’ can you please refrain from putting playhouses outside your shops, too. A toddler and a playhouse can only equal an exasperated mum luring said child out – eventually – with a bourbon cream. True story.