I get restless and feel the need for changes.
I daydream sometimes about living elsewhere. Always near the sea. I’d love to be able to just jump in the car and pop to the beach with the kids. And I’d imagine I’d have a home like this (if you’ve seen The Holiday, you’ll get the idea) and they’d happily go to a little village school (I’m not considering affordability in this musing!) I’m very aware of wanting to give my children the best possible life that I can, as we all no doubt are, and I think that an environment like this, with fresh air, safe, with a beach so they can spend hours and hours outdoors, perhaps take up surfing, would be fantastic for them.
Maybe I want to live by the beach because I am so far away from any. We do have a huge park right on our doorstep, along with many, many other parks, reserves and gorgeous outside spaces. I know that that makes us lucky. The area that we live in is a nice one, and being so close to a major city, we have the advantages of all of the culture and shopping that that brings if we choose to venture those 20 minutes in to Birmingham. Please don’t get me wrong, as I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with where we live, and we have a lovely home that we have worked hard for, so I am very grateful. I just get restless.
There are so many places that we’ve visited that draw me. The New Forest is stunning, and we loved exploring all around that area. I have fond childhood memories of Devon, we’ve enjoyed our breaks in Somerset, we visited Norfolk for the first time last year and found it to be very beautiful and peaceful. Now, I know that in a holiday environment, with rose-tinted glasses, many places are appealing, so I’d be injecting a fair bit of realism before making any decisions. The children are still very young and yet to start school or form any really strong bonds of friendship. So why not go for it?
I live in the town that I was born in. My children were born in the same hospital that I was born in. It’s all so familiar. I might sound like someone who loves the familiar, the routine, but actually, I love and embrace change. It interests and challenges me. Maybe change in other areas of my life is easier for me because I’m surrounded by so much stability and familiarity. Back when I worked full time, I was fortunate enough to climb the ladder quite quickly which prevented me from getting bored in any role. I don’t have that now. I’m sure that that is a major contributing factor to my restlessness. Maybe I need to channel it into all in a different direction? But a move?
Our family is here. My mum lives a few minutes away, and we are very close. My dad actually lives in Wales, though works just a short distance from here, so can pop in easily. My brother and his wife are just an hour away. My in-laws are all local, and we get on so well. My children get to see their cousins every single week, and though there is quite an age gap between them, they all get on brilliantly and it is lovely to see. These are bonds that I can’t just replicate elsewhere. And this is without mentioning our friends, how much we enjoy our groups, classes and outings, with their familiar faces. I imagine a life in a pretty place and jaunts to the beach, but when I really, really think about it, I get an empty feeling as those that I love aren’t with us.
I guess home is where the heart is, and mine is most definitely here.
But I get restless. I crave changes and challenges. It’s an energy that can be very positive, if I can just channel it properly. I need to focus and think. I know that I am rambling on. Does anyone else feel like this? Where do your daydreams take you? Do you embrace your restlessness?