To Move or Not To Move?

cottageI get restless.

I get restless and feel the need for changes.

I daydream sometimes about living elsewhere. Always near the sea. I’d love to be able to just jump in the car and pop to the beach with the kids. And I’d imagine I’d have a home like this (if you’ve seen The Holiday, you’ll get the idea) and they’d happily go to a little village school (I’m not considering affordability in this musing!) I’m very aware of wanting to give my children the best possible life that I can, as we all no doubt are, and I think that an environment like this, with fresh air, safe, with a beach so they can spend hours and hours outdoors, perhaps take up surfing, would be fantastic for them.

seasideMaybe I want to live by the beach because I am so far away from any. We do have a huge park right on our doorstep, along with many, many other parks, reserves and gorgeous outside spaces. I know that that makes us lucky. The area that we live in is a nice one, and being so close to a major city, we have the advantages of all of the culture and shopping that that brings if we choose to venture those 20 minutes in to Birmingham. Please don’t get me wrong, as I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with where we live, and we have a lovely home that we have worked hard for, so I am very grateful. I just get restless.

There are so many places that we’ve visited that draw me. The New Forest is stunning, and we loved exploring all around that area. I have fond childhood memories of Devon, we’ve enjoyed our breaks in Somerset, we visited Norfolk for the first time last year and found it to be very beautiful and peaceful. Now, I know that in a holiday environment, with rose-tinted glasses, many places are appealing, so I’d be injecting a fair bit of realism before making any decisions. The children are still very young and yet to start school or form any really strong bonds of friendship. So why not go for it?

I live in the town that I was born in. My children were born in the same hospital that I was born in. It’s all so familiar. I might sound like someone who loves the familiar, the routine, but actually, I love and embrace change. It interests and challenges me. Maybe change in other areas of my life is easier for me because I’m surrounded by so much stability and familiarity. Back when I worked full time, I was fortunate enough to climb the ladder quite quickly which prevented me from getting bored in any role. I don’t have that now. I’m sure that that is a major contributing factor to my restlessness. Maybe I need to channel it into all in a different direction? But a move?

Our family is here. My mum lives a few minutes away, and we are very close. My dad actually lives in Wales, though works just a short distance from here, so can pop in easily. My brother and his wife are just an hour away. My in-laws are all local, and we get on so well. My children get to see their cousins every single week, and though there is quite an age gap between them, they all get on brilliantly and it is lovely to see. These are bonds that I can’t just replicate elsewhere. And this is without mentioning our friends, how much we enjoy our groups, classes and outings, with their familiar faces. I imagine a life in a pretty place and jaunts to the beach, but when I really, really think about it, I get an empty feeling as those that I love aren’t with us.

I guess home is where the heart is, and mine is most definitely here.

But I get restless. I crave changes and challenges. It’s an energy that can be very positive, if I can just channel it properly. I need to focus and think. I know that I am rambling on. Does anyone else feel like this? Where do your daydreams take you? Do you embrace your restlessness?

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39 thoughts on “To Move or Not To Move?”

  1. I am much the same. I’m a Brummie born and bred too. Living near the city is very convenient, but I sometimes yearn for the sea and fresh air. We’re lucky that we can be in the countryside pretty quickly though. My family are close by too. I think though the difficulty is jobs. It would be difficult for my husband to get a good job in the places that I sometimes yearn to live.

    1. Yes, I do think that the reality of it is too much, and you’re right in saying there’s plenty of lovely countryside within easy reach. That sea is just so far away, though!

  2. Hi there lovely, I understand where you are coming from. I would love to live near to the sea too. We often go camping in Devon and we love being able to drive to lots of different beaches. However we will prob not be moving soon as we are hopefully going to be building an extension soon! I am so excited x x

  3. I know exactly what you mean! I get restless all the time, it’s probably why I am always studying or have some project on the go. Sometimes I wish I could just sit and take life as it comes but it just doesn’t suit me. Embrace it and channel it like you say. Who knows where it might take you and it doesn’t have to be too far from home either 🙂

    1. You sounds so similar to me – always having to be working on something or have a new project on the horizon to excite and challenge me! I’ll be doing my best to channel it into something useful 🙂

  4. I’m the opposite. My parents moved us around all the time as kids. I hated it. just hated it. Plus you have no place you can call a home town, either. Rootless.
    Then as an adult i’ve lived in private rental places and again, have to move around. Last year I finally got a permanent home with a housing association. I am almost 50 years old now and at last have a place I can STAY. It means the world, I can tell you.
    So the grass isn’t always greener, I promise XX

    1. I just can’t imagine this, of course, though I’m pleased you’re not got a chance to put those roots down. And yes, I don’t doubt that the grass isn’t always greener – need to keep hold of this good thing here, and perhaps think of different challenges. Thank you x

  5. I’ve moved so many times that although we’re not in our dream home now, there is no chance of us moving unless we win the lottery. I’d love to live in a huge old farmhouse with a loft and a basement and have outbuildings with an enormous garden. I too would like to live by the sea but would miss living smack bang in the middle of Cannock Chase too much so it will remain a beautiful daydream x

    1. Oh now that sounds just gorgeous – come on the lottery win! I didn’t realise you lived so close by – we love Cannock Chase, and yes, I’m certain you’d miss it as it is gorgeous. Nice to have our daydreams, though x

  6. I am the same – always craving change. A dear blogging chum recently moved to Tasmania and seeing her photos of Hobart has made me crave change even more. Even though it’s totally impractical for us to go anywhere – I daydream away! x

    1. Yes, we’ve friends who moved to Australia last month and keep seeing their Facebook updates. Now that would be a step too far, but I do need some sort of change, so I’ll just have to work something out much closer to home. We’ve got to have our daydreams, though 🙂

  7. As someone who loves by the sea, I can understand why it calls to you. I love it, especially in the winter, crashing waves and a strong, cold wind to blow the cobwebs away! I also quite like moving but we came to where we are now to be closer to family and, like you, I wouldn’t want to give that up!

  8. Oh I relate to this! I am the same and have moved a fair bit actually. I have learned that you take yourself with you and that the real restlessness is about me not my surroundings. Having said that our last move did make a good difference to our lives. Where did I move? Back to my home town!

  9. I never get this! We’re moving soon – round the corner! We live in the village I grew up in. But I have a friend who has always craved the sea. Every time she goes on holiday she gets restless and wants to move, then she settles and says she’s happy and she’s staying. But this time next week, she really will be moving to the sea! I’ll miss her and her family 🙁

    1. I’m terrible for it, but as I say, the pull of family is way too strong for me to actually move. Sorry about your friend moving x

  10. This is certainly something that we have visited and re-visited a LOT over the years. We even went as far as selling our home and moving into rented accommodation with the plan of moving to Bath. We never got there as the dream home we were moving for fell through twice and the pull of our children having started school here, stopped us. It’s a huge decision and I’m just not sure I am brave enough. It doesn’t stop us dreaming though, even single beautiful holiday destination we come across has a certain allure BUT as you say, a holiday is very different from living there every day. An interesting post 🙂

    1. Oh, very close to doing it then, and Bath is gorgeous. I know I just couldn’t move the kids from their family, though, however strong the coast calls me. And yes, reality is different to the holiday vibe.

  11. Feel restless all the time and wanting to move house has been on the cards for ages. Sadly, daughters have scuppered plans by going to universities 8 hours apart from each other, which would make this difficult. But, if you can manage to do it – then why the hell not! #PoCoLo

  12. I often feel restless, my Mum thinks I’m the only person in the world that doesn’t mind moving! I always said I’d move down to the New Forest when I won the lottery but I think my ill health will put a stop to my itchy feet. Now’s the time I’m appreciating only being half an hour away from family and Addenbrookes Hospital! Daydreams are fabulous though 🙂 x

    1. Hideous that your ill health keeps you rooted, but yes, I guess your proximity to family and the hospital has it’s benefits. We can still dream x

  13. I think I’ve done enough moving for the time being! Although, this move has made me less reluctant to move again in the future. I feel less tied to one place than I did. Having family and friends close by shouldn’t be underestimated though, it’s tough being without a support network xx

    1. Of course – I should have come straight to you to talk through my restlessness! That support network is hugely important to me and I love our families so much, so just can’t see a move happening. Still restless, though…. 😉

  14. Ooooh its a hard decision…as much as part of me would love to live by the beach…I’m at city girl at heart x good luck in choosing can imagine its a difficult one…yet quite exciting too x

  15. I have a deep rooted desire to live in an old converted, blue shuttered farm house in the south west of France, surrounded by sunflowers and vineyards. We always planned to do it when we thought we could never have children – then the girls appeared and although I still dream about it, I’m scared to uproot them and take them away from our family.
    I love where we live, I love our house and our garden, but that old France desire is always there and some days I just want to pack and do it.
    I have seen The Holiday and I love that cottage x

    1. I’d imagine that unless (until?!) you actually do it, it’ll always be there. Uprooting family is a huge thing, but maybe one day 🙂

  16. The main thing I love and keeps me sane about where I currently live in the south fork of Long Island, NY is that we live by the sea and are surrounded by beaches…but I miss my friends and life back in England. I hope and plan to move back in the future and build a little home…and never move again.

    1. That does sound lovely. And you have your plan to build and coms home to look forward to, too. Can’t imagine being that far from family, but then it’d be a huge adventure and experience x

  17. Up until June this year I had always loved in Surrey and Berkshire very near my family. I now live in a brand new are – Somerset – and I worked it was rose tinted glasses. It isn’t. I love it. The people are lovely and the way of life is better. I also spend better quality time with my Mum. Thanks for linking to PoCoLo x

    1. There’s quite a big move then, and I’m so pleased it’s worked out for you all. I do love Somerset, so will try not to be too envious & restless! Thanks for hosting x

  18. Having bounced about all over the place I’m actually very settled where I am nowadays, though I do love the idea of a holiday home by the sea (as in so close you can hear the waves breaking) but I think we would have to win the lottery for that to happen ;). #pocolo

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